UNCOMMON SENSE: Favorite Day of February Monday, January 31, 2011 By Editor Zane Clark - Advertising A long time ago, when the calendar was created, the month of February was chosen to be number 2 in a line of 12 months. In February one day stands out above the rest. One day makes men weep tears of joy and happiness because they get to spend time focusing on their one true love. Yes, you guessed it...... FOOTBALL! February ushers in the epitome of football celebrations, Super Bowl Sunday. On such a grand and glorious occasion men are at the peak of excitement. Nothing compares to kicking back, eating junk food, and watching a bunch of talented athletes knock the snot out of each other. Now ladies, I am aware there are rules for Valentine’s Day, (although I’m not really an expert on them) but I’m almost certain none of you women out there realize there are rules, guidelines, and, commandments that MUST be followed on Super Bowl Sunday. Even though no one in the past has taken the time to sit down and write down everything I need to know about Valentine’s Day, I am going to be a Good Samaritan and give you a Super Bowl survival guide so you can appease your man on his big day. 1.  PAY ATTENTION TO THE GAME-- I can’t tell you how many times I have heard “What happened?” after a big play or a blown call. If you want to know what happened then sit there with your mouth shut and watch the game. Just to be fair, I have NO CLUE what is going on during “chick flicks”, but I don’t interrupt the movie every five seconds just so I can be up-to-date. 2. WHEN CHEERLEADERS COME ON DON’T YELL AT ME-- I get it, I am a man. You think that anytime a pretty girl comes on television I am sitting there staring all googly eyed with drool running out  of my mouth. Well, I don’t. Imagine this, I’m trying to enjoy the entire experience of the game when the screen changes to a kick line of girls supporting my team. This is completely ruined when I hear, and feel, a shrill high pitched scream tearing my ear drum in half.   It is NOT my fault the camera crew decided a close up shot of a cheerleader would be a good idea. 3. DON’T ASK TO CHANGE THE CHANNEL...EVER-- Commercials are almost as important as the game itself so I will not change the channel to check on “Pretty Little Liars” or “Desperate Housewives”. If you would listen to rule #1 and watch the tv you would see all the hard work and effort companies put into their commercials. They work all year to develop the best, funniest, and most original commercial skit they can. Then they pay millions of dollars for such a prime time slot. When you even ask to change the channel you are disrespecting me, the companies, and the spirit of the Super Bowl. 4. I DON’T CARE ABOUT CALORIES--  I may go out and spend a good chunk of change on junk food, but that is okay. Super Bowl Sunday is a day for guys to indulge...even more so than usual.  If I want to live off twinkies, ho-hos, and ding-dongs then leave me be and let me clog my arteries peacefully. Besides, I’m a guy, I don’t really care about my figure. 5. KNOW WHICH TEAM YOU WANT TO ROOT FOR BEFORE THE GAME-- A team looking “pretty” is NOT a good reason to root for them. When their normal team doesn’t make it to the big game,  guys will spend hours watching past games, studying statistics, and reading articles trying to determine which team is more likely to win. Based on the research, and after hours of serious deliberation men will decide whether they want to cheer for the overall favorite, or the true underdog. Lucky for you ladies the Miami Dolphins and their “Pretty” uniforms are not in this years Super Bowl. Maybe you should ask your man which team he is rooting for, but make sure you ask before the game so you don’t interrupt his ceremony of worship to the football gods. This year’s Super Bowl is sure to be an awesome match-up. Two teams who caught spark late in the season will be pitted against one another for the ultimate gridiron glory. But, first let me pose a question to those ladies who made the wise decision to read this. What two teams are playing in this Super Bowl? I will leave it to you to find out, but fair warning, you should probably figure out that teeny weeny tidbit  before Sunday, February 6 rolls around.

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