One November day, a blood-curdling scream echoes across Ms. Ruppel’s Intro to Publications class. An invader has perched upon senior Sunita Fox’s computer. Soon, the entire room is thrown into chaos, a cacophony of screams bouncing off the walls – all over a creature no more than half an inch tall.

Ladies and gentlemen, the Brown Marmorated Stink Bug has arrived.

The stinkbugs are “hitchhikers” from Asia that probably entered the country in packing crates about eight or nine years ago. They usually spend their days munching on garden foliage, but in the fall, they retreat into warmer indoor environments – like CHS classrooms. Thankfully, they cannot reproduce in these environments, instead opting to use trees for this purpose. Nevertheless, a few have popped up around the school from time to time, including in the art building.

“You’d open the cabinet to take out your clay project and there would be one staring back at you,” recollected sophomore Megan Boller.

The bugs use a nasty stench as a defense mechanism to make them appear unappealing to predators. As a result, stepping or squishing them can produce an unpleasant scent. If you come in contact with a stink bug, you have one of three options, notwithstanding the obligatory “run away screaming” option already demonstrated by Fox and company.

First, simply allow the bug to walk onto a folder or other flat surface. Then, one can open a window and release the bug into the great outdoors. Another option is to gently whisk the bug away in a tissue to the toilet to be flushed. Finally, Wikipedia suggests an electric flyswatter to dispose of the pest in a painless and unsmelly way; however, these tools are hard to come by.

CHS students have been doing a lot of insect disposal, as the stink bugs have found their way into bedrooms all across town.

“They smell so bad!” exclaimed freshman Sophia Mantelli. “The outside of my house has close to 1000 bugs. They crawl through the ventilation, and they’re even in my toilet.”

Even the faculty have not remained untouched. AP United States History legend Geri Hastings has encountered the stink bugs in her home.

“I have a white house, so occasionally I’ll see them dotting the siding,” Hastings said. “They look like something prehistoric – very unusual.”

Though the stink bug invasion certainly does not seem to equal that of the Great Cicada Emergence of 2004, they’re still making their presence known. Listen carefully, CHS, and you may hear the sound of a surprised shriek. It’s tough to be a bug, indeed.